This week, it was revealed that a new species of gibbon found in the rainforests of China has been named the Skywalker hoolock gibbon because the scientists involved are fans of Star Wars. But that was hardly the only name under consideration, as corporations and celebrities made their pitch to get some primate publicity...
Rejected Names for the Newly-Discovered Species of Gibbon
—Pabst Blue Gibbon (Jameson)
—Any Gibbon Sunday (Brandon)
—Gibbon! (feat. Pharrell Williams) (Mike)
—Gibbon Away, Gibbon Away, Gibbon Away Now (Joe)
—Doritos Locos Gibbon (Matt)
—Gibbon Kardashian (Dan)
—Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III (Tenessa)
—Mel Gibbon (Jameson)
—The Alt-Gibbon (Brandon)
—Jar Jar Gibbon (Mike)
—The Jetah Fahking Sucks! Gibbon (proposed by scientists from Boston) (Joe)
—Otis Spunkmeyer's Old Timey Chocolate Chip Gibbon (Matt)
—Chinese Tradedeficit Climatehoax (Jameson)
—The 2017 Mercedes Gibbon Limited Edition (Brandon)
—Gibbon: Tokyo Drift (Dan)
—The Lord Gibbon and He Takegibbon Away (Mike)
—U.S. District Attorney Samuel Yates (Jameson)
—Buttface Says What? Gibbon (Brandon)
—Leeza Gibbon (Joe)
—Michael Gimbon, the Michael Gambon gibbon (Jameson)
—Reese's Peanut Butter Gibbon (Brandon)
—The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (Mike)
Baron von Contributors: Tenessa Gemelke, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Dan Lee, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner
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