Oct 14, 2011

Netflix CEO Reed Hastings announced this week that the company was scrapping their plans to split their service into two parts, where the DVDs-by-mail business would have been renamed Qwikster, due to customer complaints. But that's not the only idea they're pulling the plug on...

Other Ideas Netflix is Scrapping

—Petflix. (Brandon)

—A consulting service where they will name your new website for you. (Jameson)

—If you add a Nicolas Cage movie made after 2000 to your queue, instead of a DVD, they'll just send a mental health professional to your house. (Joe)

—Netflixlovers.com, a fetish site for people who enjoy making love to Netflix DVD sleeves. (Matt)

—Reducing their catalog to Grease 2 and only Grease 2. I mean, c'mon, it doesn't make any sense if you haven't seen Grease. (Mike)

—Rick Perry. (Tenessa)

—Every DVD copy of Tree of Life will come with a handful of skin flakes from director Terrance Malick. (Brandon)

—A $9-per-month plan offering instant streaming access to the ads you watch at the theater while waiting for the movie to start. (Jameson)

—Their pet project, Castrology Weekly, the entrepreneurial magazine for those in the business of trendspotting bull castration futures through the study of astrological signs. (Matt)

—Murder for hire. (Mike)

—Dickflix: Your one-stop source for the films of Andy Dick. (Brandon)

—A Netflix-exclusive sequel to Nick Swardson's Bucky Larson movie. (Jameson)

—Revamped "Suggestions For You" section that would contain personalized messages like: "Lose some weight, tubby", "Add a little more makeup there, fugmo", or "Go fuck yourself, Matt". (Matt)

—Every time you order a movie other than Source Code, it sends you Source Code anyway. Because you should totally watch Source Code. (Joe)

—A service that lets you stream footage of other people watching a movie on DVD. (Brandon)

—Boxster: an additional website where users could spend $2 per month to receive an e-mailed scan of the back cover of the DVD case for the discs they received from Qwikster. (Jameson)

—Gooogle.com, which replicates Google searches with the added fun of an extra "o"! (Matt)

—VHS rentals for ironic hipsters. (Tenessa)

—You send them a DVD from your own collection, they'll mail you a toe. (Brandon)

—Snakeskin DVD sleeves. (Matt)

—A secondary audio track on streaming titles so you can hear people talking, rustling candy wrappers, and getting phone calls – just like at the movies! (Jameson)

—Ten-picture production deal with Carrot Top. (Mike)

—Netforks: Your Home for Virtual Forks! (Brandon)

—The requirement that every new member must rent The Last Airbender and watch it with M. Night Shyamalan. (Matt)

—If your movie takes longer than 30 minutes to watch, it's free! (Joe)

Baron von Contributors: Tenessa Gemelke, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner

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