May 22, 2009

As winter turns to spring, people start focusing their attention on projects around the house. And many will turn to do-it-yourself books for advice and instruction. Just not these ones.

Least Popular Home Repair Books

—Harry Potter and the Curse of the Leaky Toilet (Mike)

—Build a House Out of Nothing But Doors (Jameson)

—Just Whack It With Something Until It Either Works or Breaks Completely (Joe)

—Transform Your Garage Into a Hobo Brothel (Brad)

—Shitting Your Way to Cost-Effective Home Insulation (Matt)

—Caulking When You Have No Caulk (Sean)

—Turning Your Outhouse Into an Inhouse (Brandon)

—Poisonous Chinese Drywall and Other Budget-Savers (Jameson)

—The Pervert's Guide to Cleaning Rusty Pipes (Matt)

—Hey Kids, It's SpongeBob SquareVila! (Mike)

—Converting Your Furnace to Run on Monkey Saliva (Brad)

Richard Karn's Educated Guess: How Houses Are Built (Jameson)

—How Glory Holes Can Improve the Value of Your Home (Matt)

—So You Want Your Home to Look More Like the DMV (Brandon)

—Leafing Your Roof: Natural Camouflage Against the Google Earth Terrorist Planes (Matt)

—Your Guide to the Ultimate Three-Bidet Master Bathroom (Jameson)

—The Drunk Dude's Guide to Power Tools (Brad)

—The Play It By Ear Series: Installing Cabinets That Don't Quite Fit (Jameson)

—Here's How a Husband Would Fix It (If You Had One, Which Is Something You Might Start Thinking About, Because It's Not Like You're Getting Any Younger) (Joe)

—How to Fill in the Holes From the Time Your Wife Threw a Fork at Your Head and It Stuck Into the Wall Right Next to Your Fucking Ear (Mike)

—Phil Spector on Soundproofing Your Killing Room (Matt)

—Using Your Sister's Kids for Unskilled Free Labor (Jameson)

—How to Make That Pole in Your Basement Look Like Something Else When Your Family Comes Over (Sean)

—Fabricating a Duct Tape Toilet (Brad)

—Tornados: The Natural Way to Remodel Your Kitchen (Matt)

—The Only Support Column Your Balcony Really Needs (Jameson)

—How to Convince the Wife That Your House Is Fine as It Is (Joe)

Baron von Contributors: Sean Hecht, Brad Kruse, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner

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