POOP READING
Dec 19, 2008

Some stories and characters become part of holiday tradition. Others are quickly and wisely forgotten.

Least Popular Holiday Tales

—Twas the Night Before the Auto Bailout (Mike)

—Santa and Rudolph's Civil Union (Jameson)

—How the Grinch Stole $33,000 in a Nigerian Email Scam (Matt)

—Santa Saves KISS From Making KISS Saves Christmas (Sean)

—Muntadhar, the Elf Who Threw a Shoe at Santa Claus (Brandon)

—Li'l Benny and the Intensive, Weeklong, End of the Fiscal Year Tax Code Seminar (Joe)

—Reggie, the Reindeer Plagued By Irritable Bowel Syndrome (Brad)

—I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus in His Private Area (Jameson)

—The Governor Who Sold Christmas (Mike)

—Christmas in Guantanamo Bay, or Why Some People Hope All They Get for Christmas is a Lump of Coal (Sean)

—Frosty the Unsuspecting Victim of Global Warming (Brandon)

—A Christmas Carol II: Cratchit's Revenge (Matt)

—Richard Belzer's Autobiographical Yuletide Rant (Jameson)

—No Virginia, Your Parents Have Been Lying to You (Sean)

—How the New Orleans Saints Saved Hanukkah (Brandon)

—Let's Just Hope He Passes Out Early Again This Year: The Uncle Doug Story (Joe)

—The Christmas Mommy Got Checked for Herpes (Mike)

—The City Hall Nativity Brawl, and Other Two-Fisted Tales of Hard Combat from the War on Christmas (Jameson)

—It's an Economic Recession Christmas, Charlie Brown (Matt)

—The Re-Gift of the Magi (Sean)

—Dick Cheney's Waterboarding Christmas (Mike)

—The Twelve Days of Petty Bickering (Brandon)

—Cock-Blocked on Christmas Again (Jameson)

—Ringo Starr Does Too Count as a Singer, You Bitch! and Other Classic Family Arguments About Scattergories (Joe)

—O.J. Simpson's It's a Wonderful Life (Matt)

—The Spoiled, Bratty Child Who Screamed and Carried On Until His Parents Bought Him What He Wanted and Learned Nothing Meaningful About Life in the Process (Sean)

—The Vomitiest New Year's There Ever Was (Brandon)

Baron von Contributors: Sean Hecht, Brad Kruse, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner

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