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Baron von Funny

Sports

Aug 12, 2016

The 2016 Summer Olympics began in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil this week, and in addition to all of the spectacle and competition, viewers have been treated to some surprising athlete names, like tennis player Jack Sock and diver Steele Johnson. But the unusual names don't end there...

Other Olympians People Are Amazed They've Never Heard of Before

—Sunny Felcher (Mike)

—Wank Napkin (Jameson)

—Ted Cunnilingus (Brandon)

—Comcast Visa Coke III (Matt)

—Dick Jerkins (Tenessa)

—Kenyan-born marathoners Salack, Malik and Zorak Obama, all of whom vigorously insist that there is no fourth brother in their family (Joe)

—Mary Fuch-Kille (Mike)

—Face Welty (Jameson)

—Fart Barfington (Brandon)

—Ingrid Abel Hulk (Matt)

—Amanda Havesexwithwomen (Tenessa)

—Shamon Horseyhaunches (Mike)

—Peter Bulge (Jameson)

—Gglorg Torggblorggg (Brandon)

—Shark Nado (Mike)

—Sy DeBoob (Jameson)

—Eddie "Erection City" Bonertown (Brandon)

—Chey Cow-Themtits (Matt)

—Benedict Cumberbatch (Mike)

—Tarl Rarlbarpington (Jameson)

—Chesty Mountain (Mike)

—UnĂ¯d Prostateexam (Brandon)

—Hun Guhr-Pang (Mike)

—Eeta Lottadick (Matt)

—Sheestha Fasstist (Brandon)

—Octopussy (Mike)

—Tongan flag-bearer Greasy McBonersproing (Joe)

—Ole Empian (Mike)

Baron von Contributors: Tenessa Gemelke, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner

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